even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
