1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My balls are so social today.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
