And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
