I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
