I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
