i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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