So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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