At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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