oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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