is your mom at the bar?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
