Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
