question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
