She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
