The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize
