I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
