The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
