Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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