Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
do nipples grow back?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
