She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
