he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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