You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
sex in a hospital.. check
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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