Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
