KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
