That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
there is puke in my bra ... again
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