fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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