You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
