How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
