I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize