wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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