I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
