No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
