I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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