i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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