Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
zippers are such a cool invention
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
