you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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