puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We don't watch enough power rangers
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
