Screwed.edu
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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