Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
