i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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