where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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