R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
