Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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