Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
