i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
