"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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