girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
