question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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