You're my little dorito
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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