I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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