i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
